-
Forget the Joneses. I can't
keep up with the Simpsons!
-
Stupidity is not a handicap.
Park elsewhere!
-
You can't scare me. I drive a
school bus!
-
Help stamp out, eliminate and abolish redundancy!
-
Get the facts first - you can
distort them later!
-
You can't scare me - I have
children!
-
If a man says something in the
woods and there are no women there, is he still wrong?
-
Computer problems? Have you
checked the loose nut in front of the keyboard?
-
The trouble with political
jokes is - they get elected.
-
Sometimes you're the bug, and
sometimes you're the windshield.
-
I would like to help you out.
Which way did you come in?
-
I know Karate, Kung Fu, and
47 other dangerous words.
-
EXPANSION SLOTS: The extra
holes in your belt buckle.
-
Dragons love you. You're
crunchy and good with ketchup.
-
Don't play stupid with me -
I'm better at it!
-
Dime: a dollar with all the
taxes taken out.
-
Did ya hear? They took the
word gullible out of the dictionary!
-
They told me I was gullible,
and I believed them!
-
Do not disturb. Already
disturbed!
-
As I said before, I never
repeat myself.
-
Everything I need to know I
got from watching Gilligan's Island.
-
This website may not be idiot
proof, but at least it's dimwit resistant.
-
Out of my mind. Back in five
minutes!
-
No matter where you go, there
you are. Huh?
-
My opinions may have changed,
but not the fact that I am right.
-
Flashlight: A case for
holding dead batteries.
-
I'm not a complete idiot,
some parts are missing.
-
"I've gone to find myself. If
I should return before I get back, please ask me to wait."
-
Waiter, there's no fly in my
soup!
- Kermit the Frog
-
"He who would give up a
little liberty in return for a little security deserves neither liberty nor
security."
- Benjamin Franklin
-
"Even if you're on the right
track, you'll get run over if you just sit there."
--Will Rogers
